I’m having one of those weeks. The kind that was supposed to be busy and productive and fun, but has very clearly become one of those ‘survive a moment at a time’ weeks. The kind of week where I wonder how, oh how, I manage to ever get anything done as a mother with two little ones. And not ‘grand life goal type’ things done. Oh no, more like, how am I supposed to get dinner cooked and laundry done. And the sheer mess! As soon as one mess is cleaned, I turn around and there’s another giant mess. At least during weeks like this it feels that way.
I generally try and keep things positive around here, as I’m sure you (and I) don’t want to dwell on all my frustrations. I choose to live this kind of lifestyle and, truly and honestly, I love it most of the time. Most of the time the same messes and time scheduling challenges are present, but we manage to have a lot of fun despite it all; I manage to help the kids as they go about their busy little lives; I manage to chip away at my own interests and goals a little bit at a time. Aaron and I do our best to try and prioritize everyone’s interests and needs in our family. I’m no martyr mommy. Really I’m not. Most of the time I enjoy my life and I get to do plenty of things I love. And for the most part on most days, it all goes well.
Oh, but those weeks! The weeks where clearly I need a couple days alone in the woods, hermit style. When really that’s what would fix my attitude. And well, that kind of fix just isn’t very feasible as a breastfeeding mom of a teething little one.
Those weeks! You know the kind, don’t you?
Thankfully they’re not forever. Eventually the feeling of flow returns and my attitude shifts. Eventually the baby sleeps better. Eventually we find our way back to our family rhythm. Eventually. Nothing is constant. It’s always changing. And none of it is forever. Even those precious sibling moments that make my heart swell. And even those moments where I quite literally have to shut the door to my room and remind myself to breathe so I don’t throw a fit too. And then twenty minutes later, do it all over again.